Bruins Slip To Ninth Place in the Conference

Where does the time go? It seems like only yesterday I was writing about how the Bruins had won only a single game in their last seven tries, and were looking for chances to right the ship.

Since then, they've lost twice more.

Today's befoulment came at the hands of the Hurricanes, who are - that's right! - in last place in the Eastern Conference.

I don't even know what else to say about the Bruins right now. A couple of weeks ago they were battling for first place in the Division, and now they're barely .500, having dropped out of the playoff picture. Who are they currently battling with? Why, the Islanders, Panthers and Thrashers, of course! The worst part is that the Bruins' losses have made it possible for the Canadiens to crawl back into the playoff standings.

Every team could blame a run like the Bruins have had on the injuries that they have sustained (which is totally valid), but the reality is that every team still has to play every game with the personnel they have available. This is the same throughout the league, and every team gets injuries.

Furthermore, the Bruins started the season with a full lineup and started very poorly. So, I have no idea what the B's can do to stem the tide of losses, but something has got to fall into place.

At this point the Bruins are looking at 5 days off (playing again on Friday) to try to fix things. They have two goalies who can't stop beach balls, a powerplay that is unplugged and a scoring drought that makes....oh, let's say the worst team in the Eastern Conference...look like an offensive powerhouse.

It's not as bad as the bright yellow Teddy Bear sweaters, but it's getting pretty close.

Bruins Add Whoa to their Woes

I've been really busy lately, and after long days in front of a computer, I've been less than willing to also spend my nights in front of the laptop watch the Bruins lose.

Which feels harsh to say, but it is the reality. The B's have 1 win in their last 7 games, and have blown leads in at least 3 of those games. They've looked terrible.

Experience has taught me that the Bruins usually go on a foul losing streak through January (last year being a notable exception), however, despite my efforts, I could not find any month-by-month tally of the Bruins record through the years to corroborate this. Which is just to say, I just don't have access to a year-by-year, month-by-month spreadsheet for these guys to show you what the real numbers are. But rest assured, even their best seasons are mired in the January blues.

Slides like this are what cost Claude Julien his job in New Jersey and Montreal - unexplained skids that are out of keeping with the level of talent on the team. The Bruins have injuries to at least 5 key guys, granted, but these losses are complete losses: everyone is to blame, from the Vezina-winning goalie (and his phenom backup), through the Norris-winning defenseman (and his cohorts), to the surprising top-six forwards. They just plain suck.

The B's will have a chance to try to right the ship this afternoon against Ottawa - a team that they were battling with for Division lead just a couple of weeks ago. The Bruins now hold down 7th place in the Conference, but are 2 points out of 11th spot.

If the Bruins are not able to staunch the losses, as fans, we should expect some changes to the lineup. And as Bruins fans we know that these 'changes' can often come with devastating results (bye-bye Joe Thornton).

Let's see what happens this afternoon....

Bruins Losing Players Quicker Than Games

Last night's blown lead and eventual loss to the Blackhawks will cost the Bruins more than just the 2 points, as Marc Savard joined the long list of injured Bruins. Here is a brief recap of who the B's are missing:

Marc Savard: Injured knee in the first minute of last night's game, will undergo MRI tomorrow, and will hopefully only be out of the lineup for 2-3 weeks.

Patrice Bergeron: Broken finger (in three places!), and will miss another 2 weeks if the projected recovery time is correct.

Byron Bitz: Injured back, status unknown (at least by me - I'm sure someone knows. Possibly his doctor, maybe his wife).

Andrew Ference: Was slammed into the boards by Chris Phillips in the B's game against Ottawa, and will miss at least 6 weeks with a groin injury.

Mark Stuart: Broken sternum. I have no idea what the cause of the injury was, but it must have been craaaazy painful. Broken sternum? Damn, girl...

The only positive news for the B's lately is that Milan Lucic made his return from his second extensive injury of the season. But if you look down the list of players, above, you'll notice the Bruins have lost their top three Centres and two Defensemen who eat up a lot of minutes.

I get the feeling the annual January Slide is about to begin.

On the internet, nobody can hear you sighing loudly.

Sigh.

Bruins Play 3 Minute Hockey Game, Lose to Rangers, Cats Surprised

There were good reasons to watch last night's Bruins - Rangers game. First, there was the chance that the Rangers could lose, which always makes the universe seem like a logical place, following a divine plan.

Also, any chance of the Rangers losing increases the likelihood of watching their coach, John Tortorella, go apoplectic behind their bench. This, as they say in the industry, makes for good TV.

However, it was not meant to be. The Rangers beat the Bruins, Tortorella looked even more like Fonzie and kept his cool, and the universe now seems hazardous, random and prone to crying jags. Or maybe that's just me.

The Bruins, for their part, tried to play a 3 minute hockey game, and (unfortunately) it nearly worked. Being badly outplayed for 50-or-so minutes, the Bruins were unable to string two passes together without a giveaway, let alone generate any offensive pressure, and were down 2-0 deep into the 3rd period.

Sadly, when the Bruins did start skating with 5 minutes left in the game, they were immediately rewarded with 2 quick goals to tie it up. I say "sadly" not because I wanted the Rangers to win (re-read my opening paragraphs) but rather because I hate the idea of the Bruins being rewarded with a win for a game they didn't really ever compete in. Seriously, if you are making millions of dollars a year, the least you could do is try for more than 3 minutes a game. Even I skate hard for longer than 3 minutes a game.

Last night, the B's played like their pre-game meal was everything I ate over the holidays, stacked up and served to them in one sitting. They were lifeless and loose, disinterested and slow. It was a very frustrating game to watch.

My usual companions for Bruins games - our two cats - learned all sorts of new words last night. Ever seen a cat's ears catch fire? Missed Bruins pass - WHOOSH! Soft Bruins backchecking - WHOOSH!

To make matters even worse, one of the few B's who played well - Patrice Bergeron - took a slapshot off the wrist (shot by his own defenseman, of course), and left the game. The extent of his injury is unknown, but it almost certainly marks an end to the Bruins' already dismal offense.

Yes, it was awful all around for the Bruins last night. Fortunately, they have a chance to redeem themselves tonight when they take on the Senators.

It will be interesting to see how the Bruins respond after such a brutal outing. Hopefully, Coach Julien used the post-game briefing to rip into his players, and lit up their ears like a couple of unsuspecting cats.

Maybe that's what it takes to make the Bruins come out motivated tonight. Certainly that pre-game meal didn't do them any favours.

Bruins and Satan - A Match Made in Heaven?

Saatanan Saatana - Has 51% Ownership of the Letter A

TSN is reporting that the Bruins have signed veteran winger Miroslav Satan for about $700,000. Satan won the Stanley Cup with the Penguins last year, but has (from what I can tell) been without a contract for the 2009-2010 Season, so far.

Satan was a 50 to 70 point scorer in his Buffalo years, and racked up 66 points with the Islanders in the 05-06 season, but has obviously had diminishing numbers in more recent years. He put up 36 points in 65 games with the Pens last season.

For my part, I've never been a fan of Satan, as I've seen too many games where he just floats around, out of position, waiting for scoring opportunities - rather than creating them, or taking care of his defensive responsibilities.

It is noteworthy that Satan's plus-minus rating is all over the place, going from +16 to -3, +6 to -15, +12 to -8 in successive years. What the hell, dude?

And his little "phone me!" goal celebration when he wanted a trade out of Buffalo was, to me, something that reeked of a player without class - especially stinky given that he was in an organization that had helped him reach the Stanley Cup Finals and two All-Star Games. I think it is also telling that only a few seasons removed from his little celebration, Satan was sitting at home waiting for someone to phone him with a job.

However, the Bruins are obviously far below last year's scoring output (when the team led the league in goals-for), and their powerplay is a dismal mess, so hopefully a little bit of Satanic Magic will help the Bruins' offense as they wait for Lucic to recover from injury.

It is also hopeful that the Bruins stalwart defense can compensate for Satan's appearance on the team, because, if previous season have been any indication, he's going to make gaffs that lead to counter-attack scoring chances.

Let's hope the season doesn't go to hell now that the B's have added Satan.

Aaaaaand other Satan-related humour....

Bruins - Flyers Winter Classic Summary

The words "magical" and "special" are used far too often in the hockey world, usually by players and coaches who have learned this media-speak shorthand to avoid describing their actual feelings.

However, yesterday's Winter Classic game, held outdoors in Boston's Fenway Park, actually was magical and special, and showed fans (new and established alike) the best of what hockey can offer.

It helps that the Bruins and Flyers were both hungry for the 2 point win. Had yesterday's game felt more like an All-Star Game (ie: where the win doesn't matter), it would have fallen flat. But the two-generations of animosity between the Flyers and Bruins seemed to spark both teams, and once the wonder and nostalgia of playing outdoors faded, the teams got down to hitting, fighting and trying to chip the puck into the net.

There's been barrels of digital ink spilled on the event already, so I won't rehash the details of the game here, except to say that it was awfully fun to see Tim Thomas be responsible for a goal against (due to a poorly-timed, though not undeserved, cross-check to the back of Scott Hartnell), then battle so hard in the final moments of the game to preserve the win, making at least three unbelievable saves on point-blank chances.

To then have Thomas named to the USA National Hockey Team - his dream since being 5-years old - at the end of the game, it was like writing another chapter in Thomas' storybook, vastly underdogged, career.

My previous posts have highlighted the problem with having Thomas play below his potential this season, but even having said so, there can be little doubt that he is one of the best Bruins of all time - if only for his continual ability to prove doubters wrong, and get the job done simply through his lunch-bucket work ethic.

The Winter Classic will be remembered as one of those rare, ultra-high-profile sporting events that actually lives up to the hype. The Bruins can take the experience (and the win!) forward through the rest of the season, and hopefully build on it as the Olympics approach.

Of Note: It is an absolute joy to watch so many interviews with Bobby Orr - just listening to Bobby makes me happy; For as happy as I am that Tim Thomas was named to the US National Team, as a Canadian, I cannot wish him too well in the tournament; The Bruins' retro sweaters are easily the best sweaters they have and I hope they wear them in more games this season; Coach Claude Julien and his coaching staff looked amaaaazing in their little brown fedoras - like the coaches of old!